In a couple of weeks it will be 9 years since I first arrived in France. As Fall arrives here with it's cooler temperatures and back-to-school mentality I easily reminisce about those early months. In some ways, every fall feels like that first year - there's something about the smell of the air and the light that remind me of that tumultuous period of my life when I left my urban single-girl life behind and landed in France to move in with my then-boyfriend now husband.
Becoming an expat is a different experience for everybody. For me, becoming an expat was part of committing to my relationship and starting a new life with someone. I was doing a lot at once! Like most major life changes, it was hard. In moving to France, I really had no idea what I was getting myself into or how I would be changed. I'm glad, too, because if I'd known it would take me 18 months to feel even remotely like myself then I would never have done it. And I don't regret it. At all. I love where I live, my family, my community. It just took me awhile to get there.
Earlier this spring with Expat Women: Confessions came out and the offered bloggers to review with an advance copy I took the offer. It took me only until now to write about because I find it really hard to talk about those first days with any coherency. My brain falls back into the chaos that was that time. It was as if I was an adolescent all over again (and not in a good way). The awkwardness, always saying the wrong thing, dressed not quite right, lost in the cultural cues and just sheer exhaustion of trying to take it all in and rebuild my identity (Am I American? An Expat? Will I ever be "French" enough?). Over time, I did sort it out. But some days were rough going.
I'm very glad that there are others that can write about the expat experience with fluency and authority. I'll admit that at first I was put off by the Question/Answer nature of the book, but in the end I found it easy and interesting to read and the authors are so empathetic and practical that if you ever find yourself an expat, then I would definitely read this book. I wish I had this book when I was first an expat but even after several years the advice and more importantly the supportive voice of the book was encouraging, even now. Oh yeah - now I remember why I did it. Because living abroad, despite the challenges, has made my life more rich and interesting.
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