Mom in France

Happy 2nd Birthday, Boo!

  So far so good except my lovely husband is away on the mountaineering trip and kindly left me the digital reflex camera but not the memory cards.  So no pictures yet despite the gradual present opening that's been going on since Sunday.

Party is on Sunday - hoping for no rain!

_{Wayne Thiebaud's cakes really are the perfect celebration image in my book.}

*Sigh*: Pregnancy and Work

I love living in France.  I take advantage of all the social support that's out there for me: my 6 weeks of vacation, my part-time work status as mom of an under-3 year old, and my 16 weeks of maternity leave.  But underneath all this family-friendly social policy lurks capitalist reality and the pressures of corporate life.

It took me more than 6 months to find my feet and settle after coming back to work following my maternity leave with Boo.  My days were filled with boredom, disillusionment, guilt and general sense of disconnect.  Although I had a place, I had no role.  I decided to hire a career coach which helped me think about a long-term future.  And I was promoted, given a new job and new responsibilities. I became busy and more motivated.  Just when things really took off, I got pregnant.

I suffered through the pregnancy-induced exhaustion of fall and winter - busy times in my company - giving presentations, helping others, trying to make something out of this new role.  Earlier this year, I was rewarded during my annual review, receiving the highest mark possible for the first time in my 6 years here.  Although I was continuing my career coaching looking to change my job long-term, it was so satisfying to see that I had managed to do better than great which somehow validated a SuperMom status:  Healthy son, pregnant, working 4 days a week and STILL able to excel at work.  With this I decided to negotiate for a promotion - last chance before my maternity leave.

Shortly after, recession reality set in.  No raises company-wide. Annual bonuses but we should be grateful. And the kicker: no promotions.  I was so disappointed because it seemed as if all my hard work and struggle to balance everything was for nothing.  Then a ray of hope: some exceptions could be made for promotions.  I made my case to my manager.  He held a talk with the division director who told him, bluntly, that he didn't want to promote me now since I was pregnant and I wouldn't be around the rest of the year.  A little time passed and I had another reason to try again. Same answer.

It was a repeat of what I experienced upon leaving with the first pregnancy- my immediate manager left and I expressed an interest in the role, only to have it go to a co-worker after I left several months later. 

It's so demoralizing and unfair.  And like most of the other working women I know, we just swollow it - feeling powerless to do anything about it.

A Digression from Kids and France: I love this book

I just received a copy of Maira Kalman's illustrated Elements of Style by Strunk and White - that tiny tome that all freshman composition students have to buy as required reference.  Does it make me really geeky (or just desparate for english-language reading) that I spent the evening reading it in bed? 

It is one of the most gorgeous books I've seen in a long time - cheery red cover, compact, lush and witty illustrations.  A book on grammar and english-language usage that's fun to read!

 

A little more Spring

Boo has been picking the early-arriving poppies from the olive orchard next door.  Usually they end up in a shredded mess on our terrace, but this one has managed to thrive for nearly a week in its little vase.

Late afternoon on La Croisette

My Dad is visiting so we used the excuse to do more than errands and playgrounds (or the to and fro from work) and headed down to Cannes yesterday afternoon to soak up a little Riviera glamour.  We hardly ever go to the beach or the beach cities - I think it's because they are just right there. Only 20 minutes away.  But I always love it - the air coming off the sea and the beautiful light.  It is totally different from my home in the so-called back-country which is totally suburban and was once remote farmland.

I was inspired.  Today we go to Nice.