Working Part-time

Almost exactly a year ago, while wandering the stacks of the used-book store and the trendy clothing shops of Hillsboro Village in Nashville, a friend who had recently become a father asked me what I would do about work.  It was the weekend that we were celebrating our marriage and it was also when I announced to friends and family that I was 3 months pregnant.  I don't remember by exact words, but I think I said something like: "I'll go with the flow, and do what's obvious."  He initially took that to mean that I might not go back to work, since I will already go on leave.  I think I thought at the time that I couldn't imagine stopping permanently work.

At least I had enough sense to know that I didn't really know, couldn't know, and that I would decide when the moment came.

When the moment came and I needed to decide, in early May, what to do, I realized that I would go back to work if only to maintain our standard of living.  Besides that, I was really missing the daily social interactions that work brings.  And the cry-free lunches!  But I had grown accustomed to being with Boo all the time, and couldn't imagine spending a full week of just seeing him in the morning and evenings.  I  compromised and went back to work 4 days a week, taking every Wednesday off.

I was able to do this because France has very family-friendly policies and tries to legislate a work/life balance.  Although it's far from perfect, I'm glad it's there.  As an American used to expensive health insurance, no vacation, and limited rights on this front, I always take advantage when I can.  In this case, parents (mother or father) have the right to reduce their working hours either completely or up to half-time for one year, renewable twice up to the 3rd birthday of the child.  This parental leave guards the employees seniority, existing work contract, etc., so that when the leave ends, in theory I can pick up where I left off.

I was worried about the consequences by working part-time.  Not getting promoted since I haven't been there for 7 months and now would only be there 4 days a week.  Not getting the best projects since it might not appear that I'm ambitious.  But I decided that perhaps I'm not that ambitious anyway, and being with my son was much more important to me than having the best work project.

Yesterday was my 3rd Wednesday off, and it was a dream.  We played in the morning and then walked down to the village to meet with the caterer for the baptism in 10 days.  We played some more, he napped, we napped.  We visited the garden center.  I keep at the edge of my vision any lurking guilt about doing "activities" with him on these Wednesdays -- baby gym,play groups, etc.-- that will supposedly help his development.  I suppose activities will come soon enough, but he's only 5.5 months old. I prefer a quiet day with just the two of us, not doing much.

Comments

[Cass]

It's interesting how reality intrudes on preconceived ideas. I always imagined I would take off a short period of time after birth and then go back to a full-time ambitious career. But it took me 2.5 years to go back to work after M. And I'm not all that abitious after all. The next work/life preconceived idea was that once M was in school, we'd both work full-time again. Well, M started Kindergarten this week, and I'm starting a part-time, very mom-friendly job to match. Mostly this is fine, great, a freeing lifestyle choice. But I've also gotten back in contact with former coworkers and college classmates who stuck with it, climbed the ladder, fill in that set of cliches--and I'm struck with the contrast.