Mom in France

The Firebox

Yippee!!  My mom is coming for a pre-Christmas visit.  YIKES!  We really need to get our &*(* together and finish up this house.  So the race is on.  The garden will still be a disaster (fair warning, Mom, if you're reading!) but we aim to get the house ship-shape.  So we're busy bees for the next few weeks.

Earlier in this project (and for the years of dreaming leading up to it) I spent my time on design blogs and hoarding home design magazines.  I was obsessed with how our house would feel and how the design would support and enhance the way we live.  Meanwhile, E was staying up late reading books on insulation, "green" building techniques and energy efficient ways of heating and cooling.  One of his big wishes was to have a wood burning stove in place of a traditional chimney.  With this house it was an easy choice - we had a chimney already but removed the gas burning fireplace.

Last week we had the new one installed.  I like to call it the firebox.  Because that's what it is; a fire in a box in the corner of our living room.  We were able to buy a small firebox (average 6kw output) since our space is small and so well insulated.  Once installed we had to wait a couple of days to light it (not that we need it - it's still in the mid-60s here during the day) to let all the evil chemicals related to the installation completely evaporate.  E was so excited - like a kid on Christmas Eve - and chomping at the bit to light it.  Once we'd past the 48 hours mark he went for it...and filled our house with smoke and turned the glass windows on the stove completely black. 

He was impatient.  Of course he thought something was wrong with the stove!  Ha.  After 1/2 hour the flames started roaring and he was happy.  Meanwhile, I spent 45 minutes the following morning cleaning the glass with oven cleaner - not so fun.

We have had a couple of good fires since then but then last night he came home and wanted a fire RIGHT NOW.  So he lit it and...filled the house with smoke.  At dinner time.  *sigh*.  He got it working, that is burning without a lot of smoke, but then I had to clean it again.  He asked me today to try to light one and see how it went - were there any leaks on the 2nd floor of the house where the chimney passes (in our bedroom!)?  Any further leaks coming from the stove itself? 

So I made my effort and tried to remember my Girl Scout years.  I did not succeed on the first try - smoky fire, same as E.  Then I did a little Google help and experimentation and here's what I learned:

• Don't be lazy when building the fire:  Wad up newspaper and place kindling wigwam style on top.  Light the newspaper and only when the kindling is burning add a log or two - whatever fits easily into the box.
• Know how the box gets oxygen to fuel the fire.  A few stoves have a pipe connected to the exterior wall and pulls air from the outside.  Most, like ours, have a vent in the box that pulls air from the room.  We have a vent in the wall to the outside that must be open when the fire is lit and pulls in fresh air and enters the box via the vent in the bottom.
• Know how air circulates in the house.  Our downstairs is open and a big no-no we learned the hard way:  Do not have the kitchen fan going at the same time as the fire becuase the fire will begin to smoke (or a badly built, smoky fire will get worse) and smoke will get pulled, via the vent, into the room.
• The Firebox heats the room by heating the box.  It's cast iron.  It gets HOT.  Do not leave your coffee cup on top or it can shatter or melt.  Reinforce the IT'S HOT message to little kids and visitors.  (So far, so good on this point in our house)

Now that I have the hang of making the fire, I'm really excited - it's so cozy!

 

 

When is a House Finished?

I haven't written much about Tiny House lately because it is discouraging. It's been 3 months since we officially moved in and the house feels about 90% done but that last bit is detailed and difficult to complete.  However, each time a bit gets finished, we are so happy! And we have a moment of satisfaction in seeing things come together - a little bit more of the dream realized. 

We definitely had that with the insulation.  While the inside feels mostly finished (minus some paint, light fixtures, closets and toilet), the outside is still clearly under renovation.  There is scaffolding on the walls and piles of construction materials and debris surrounding the house and in the driveway.  It's a bit discouraging coming home from work and having to make my way through the muck to get to the door.  So on the day they completed the first plaster and our house looked more like a house I felt a little bit of relief - could the end be in sight?

The insulation was expensive and difficult but we are really pleased with the result.  It hasn't been too cold yet here on the Riviera but it's cold enough and we haven't needed any heat.  Our home, even at night and during the awful rain, is staying in the mid-60s.  Unlike insulation installed on interior walls, the exterior insulation required several discrete steps - gluing the insulation to the existing wall (directly on the old plaster) [photo 1 and 2], covering the insulation in a fiberglass net [photo 3] and at the same time bolting the net and insulation to the concrete wall below to insure it doesn't move over time, and covering the entire surface with a plaster-like glue to seal it in [photo 4].  The final step will be to plaster - yet to be done.

 

The Last Gasp of Summer

The rain comes in a deluge again today and will last for at least 3 days, though I know that once it starts raining it's for at least a week.  Rain on the Riviera can be impressive - heavy at times and causing flash flooding and dragging on for days.  I won't feel too bad though because we have only had one period of that so far this fall and the past week has been glorious.

It was Halloween in the US. Here in France we celebrate All Saint's Day, or Toussaint.  Toussaint is a public holiday and 4 day weekend.  While many people travel during this period we decided to stay home - and how glad we were! 

We spent two days in the mountains, and two days on the seaside. 

Day 1:  Picnic on the Pic des Courmettes

The Pic des Courmettes is the highest mountain closest to the sea at 700m.  It's only a half hour drive to the beach and up on the plateau below the summit we felt like we were just hanging above the seashore.  The land is private but there is public access and plenty of trails for walking or climbing to the top.  We picnicked in one of the fields normally used by the sheep or goats we saw grazing elsewhere which made a terrific running place for the kids and gave us exceptional views of the coast and the mountains to the west.

Day 2: Paragliding in Gourdon

While on the Pic des Courmettes we could see paragliders (and one of our friends!) flying from nearby Gourdon.  E had the itch and so the following day we packed a second picnic and with friends headed up to Gourdon to watch the pilots.  It was a fabulous day with E flying 2.5 hours (we were long home by then).  The kids loved watching all the colorful paragliders and hangliders taking off and flying so close by.

Day 3: Lunch in Juan-les-Pins

Need I say more?

Day 4: Nice

Nice was fabulous as always.  We joined the families walking along the Promenade des Anglais and watched the G20 protesters warming up for their march later in the day.  Like everyone else, they were enjoying the weather on the beach.  We ate lunch at one the beach restaurants and enjoyed a gelato at the yummy Crema di Gelato on the square in front of the Palais du Justice.

After lunch, we visited the magnificent Carrousel Palace in the Parc Albert 1er - it is truly beautiful with magnficent horses and cars and airplanes to ride.  It's a double-decker and is just glittery to see turn.  At the top the panels are painted with scenes of landmarks of Nice.  Most I recognized but some, I know, are of buildings that have been destroyed or demolished.

What's Up With the Socialist Primary

 

For a couple of weeks last month the country was gripped with Primary Fever.  That is, the Parti socialiste, or PS for short, was electing their candidate to run against the incumbent Nicholas Sarkozy in next year's Presidential Elections.  In the background that is the daily media input I was vaguely aware of the discussion - DSK out as candidate after his prolonged stay in New  York and primaries upcoming.  My husband called one afternoon because he had to go to a "Party meeting."  It sounded either a little ominous/cold war or like he was getting ready for Hallowe'en.  But no - a lifelong SP supporter, he was going to hear about the preparations for the Primary elections and to volunteer his services at the poll on election days.

For those of you in the US watching the Republicans beginning to duke it out to run against Obama in 2012, this may not seem like a big deal.  However, the primary is a relatively new concept in France, introdcued by the PS for the presidential election of 2006.  This year, the candidates from the party held a series of debates that were so polite and tame compared to what we see in the US (on both sides of the left/right divide).  It reminded me of this old musical live performances videos from the late 50s and early 60s - rockin' tune but everybody, on-stage and off, very polite.

The PS primary of 2006 elected Segolene Royal to run against Sarkozy.  This primary was only open to registered party members and about 100K people voted (in a country of 60 million people).  The reason is that the political party structure in France is much more fragmented than in the US or UK - in 2006 there were 18 candidates for president from across the political spectrum.  Voting is held in two rounds - the first to select the two candidates with the highest number of votes and a run-off for the majority.  Usually, but not always, the elections result in candidates from the center-right and center-left parties in the final election and with the other parties supporting.  

This year, the PS did a brilliant PR gambit and called their primary the Citizen's Primary and opened the vote to anyone registered to vote in France with the stipulation that they donate 1 euro and sign a registration form saying that they adhere to the values put forth by the Party.  Sounds quaint, but it worked - nearly 3 million people voted, mostly from the left.  This number of participants gave the candidates and the party much more credibility and it became much more of a national political event which dominated the news cycle for nearly two weeks.

The result of this new process was not dramatic:  the voters selected François Hollande to run against Sarkozy.  Hollande is a longtime Party executive and the former partner of Segolene Royal.  He was her campaign manager in the last election.  The only surprises happened in the first elimination round - Royal was routed with only 7% or 188K votes and in 4th place behind Hollande, Parti president Martine Aubry and Royal's former spokesperson Arnaud Montebourg who surprised the media by gaining 17% of the votes cast.

Hollande and the PS now has the advantage of having a very public and very successful primary and he can now actively start (though slowly) running for President.  Meanwhile, on the other side of the aisle, the assumed candidate for the right, current president Sarkozy said last night on TV that he has  "job to do" and can not worry about getting elected.

Moving to France? Some Books that Helped Me

Are you moving to France?  Dreaming about it?  Already have moved and wondering what the heck you've gotten yourself into? 

At some point, I said yes to each of those questions.  Being a reader, I sought out solace and advice in books.  I didn't really know it then, but there are A LOT of books on being an expat, and more specifically, being an (anglo-saxon) expat in France.  So many people have trod the path for us, and many of those have written memoirs or handy guides.  Below are some that helped me along the way.

Readers that are living in France:  Do you have any to add that particularly entertained you or helped you in some way?  Please share in the comments! 

 

1. Paris to the Moon, by Adam Gopnik

Even if you don't move to Paris or live abroad, Adam Gopnik's memoir of  his time in Paris writing for the New Yorker is so entertaining.  He captured for me both the magic of Paris and was open about some of the humiliations he suffered while trying to navigate life in a foreign land.  My favorite episodes are trying to procure a Thanksgiving turkey, his adventures in medicine (including the birth of his child) and his essay on the profession of restaurant waitservice.

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. Almost French, by Sarah Turnbull

Like Sarah Turnbull, I too moved to France after falling in love with a frenchman.  Her memoir of her first years in Paris is so down-to-earth chronicling her impressions, frustrations and discoveries as she tried to integrate into French life.  This book above all spoke to me in a personal way as someone who had been there, done that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3. A Year in Provence, by Peter Mayle

Of course I had to finally read it.  I remember that as a student all the older people coming in to buy this book to fantasize.  (I'm the Older now).  From my high stool behind the counter reading one of the hard classics I looked down on those people, but what the heck - I was living in France after all.  And you know what?  The book is a witty account of living in a foreign land before the anglo-saxons arrived in droves.  His book may seem obvious now but he's really the one who started a genre and I still learned somethings about the French along the way.

 

For those who work with French people and who just don't get it - these are for you. Both these business-school books are very expensive - you might be able to find them used or in a library.  Or if you have a rich employer maybe you can expense the purchase :-)

 

 

 

 

 

 

4. French Management - Elitism in Action by Jean-Louis Barsoux and Peter Lawrence

The key to French Management is it's subtitle - I was already experiencing that it in a visceral way and could not understand why I wasn't being taken seriously.  Reading this book helped me understand why and this understanding helped me figure out what to do (in my case - it was change jobs!).  The book explains the education system, French cultural attitudes towards power, hierarchy, gender and money and how these characteristics inform french management behaviors. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. Managing Across Cultures by Susan Schneider and Jean-Lous Barsoux 

Managing Across Cultures was one of the most fascinating and encouraging books I read in getting ready to live and work in another country.  While I had worked in very mixed environments in California and Boston it was the job of the foreigners to fit in.  Now I was the foreigner and was trying to figure out my place. However, even though France was a mystery, living in Europe means living in a truly multi-cultural environment and people need to be able to easily adapt.  This book helped me understand that, and helped me understand my own specifically American tendencies and how they may be perceived by other cultures. 

 

A note to readers: All the books link to Amazon.com via a dedicated Mom In France link.  If you buy one of these books by clicking on the link, THANK YOU, because you just helped pay my hosting fees for the year. Also - please be aware you don't pay anything extra by purchasing through the link - Amazon is sharing a *tiny* amount with me for the privilege of you buying from them.

 

 

A Note to Mom in France Readers

Hi Everybody:

I want to let you know that I decided to accept advertising on Mom In France.  I'm just putting my toes in the water to begin with and will not be blanketing my site with flashing banners. 

Because Mom in France is really a niche blog and is a way for me to share my experiences and provide resources and information to others who are in the same boat or considering climbing aboard I will only accept advertising that is relevant to that purpose.  To start with, I'm accepting text links, sponsored posts and will do some affiliate marketing via Amazon.

If you have a service that you think would fit please send me an email. 

If you have, at any time, any feedback or comments please email me as well.

Thanks for your support!

Karin.

SOS Help Book Sale 23 October

For those of you in Paris, SOS Help, an organization that provides and English-speaking crisis hotline, is holding a fund-raising book sale on the 23 October. 

Books for sale are used English-language books across all genres. 1 euro for paperbacks and 2 euros for hardbacks.

Details:

October 23rd, 12-4pm
Orrick Law Offices
31 avenue Pierre 1ers de Serbie, 75016 Paris

Getting Ready for Winter

 

Our Indian Summer continues and I'm holding my breath a little because October usually means torrential rains.  We're in a race to if our exterior will be finished before the first big storm comes that finally turns summer into fall.

Last week the insulation was delivered - 6 weeks after we moved in. This was only slightly late and right away they started installing it.  Early on in the demolition we discovered that the insulation would have to be redone completely both in the roof and the walls.  Since our house is tiny, we decided to take the bad news as an opportunity and insulate from the outside using cork insulation - all natural, renewable and no toxic fumes.  The only downside is that it's almost 5 inches thick.  Which would have made it a no-go if we had to put it on the inside.  As it turns out, by ripping out the old insulation and wall board we gained a lot of space inside by just plastering the walls.

Lesson learned though - no interior insulation (except in the floors) means lousy acoustics.  Our tiny house echoes with noisy kids.  I'm shopping for rugs and other soft furnishing to eat some of the noise.

Once they finish glueing the cork to the existing walls, they will put a wire frame - I imagine it like chicken wire - then plaster stucco on top.  The roof insulation is made of wood fiber and looks like the usual pink wooly insulation except that its wood colored.   

 

Expat Women: Confessions

 

In a couple of weeks it will be 9 years since I first arrived in France.  As Fall arrives here with it's cooler temperatures and back-to-school mentality I easily reminisce about those early months.  In some ways, every fall feels like that first year - there's something about the smell of the air and the light that remind me of that tumultuous period of my life when I left my urban single-girl life behind and landed in France to move in with my then-boyfriend now husband.

Becoming an expat is a different experience for everybody.  For me, becoming an expat was part of committing to my relationship and starting a new life with someone.  I was doing a lot at once!  Like most major life changes, it was hard.  In moving to France, I really had no idea what I was getting myself into or how I would be changed.  I'm glad, too, because if I'd known it would take me 18 months to feel even remotely like myself then I would never have done it.  And I don't regret it.  At all.  I love where I live, my family, my community. It just took me awhile to get there.

Earlier this spring with Expat Women: Confessions came out and the offered bloggers to review with an advance copy I took the offer.  It took me only until now to write about because I find it really hard to talk about those first days with any coherency.  My brain falls back into the chaos that was that time. It was as if I was an adolescent all over again (and not in a good way).  The awkwardness, always saying the wrong thing, dressed not quite right, lost in the cultural cues and just sheer exhaustion of trying to take it all in and rebuild my identity (Am I American?  An Expat?  Will I ever be "French" enough?).  Over time, I did sort it out.  But some days were rough going.

I'm very glad that there are others that can write about the expat experience with fluency and authority.  I'll admit that at first I was put off by the Question/Answer nature of the book, but in the end I found it easy and interesting to read and the authors are so empathetic and practical that if you ever find yourself an expat, then I would definitely read this book. I wish I had this book when I was first an expat but even after several years the advice and more importantly the supportive voice of the book was encouraging, even now.  Oh yeah - now I remember why I did it.  Because living abroad, despite the challenges, has made my life more rich and interesting.

 

 

Fall is in the Air!

Folks have been posting from various nothern hemisphere climes that they "smell fall."  On the Riviera fall comes late for being so far north, something that continually suprises me.  Temperatures are still in the high 70s during the day and it has hardly rained since late July. 

Yesterday, though, it did rain.  Enough for an early morning scramble in the garden to pick up all the chair cushions and close the top on the 2CV (dang!).  The afternoon was more clear and we decided to take the kids for a walk to the Village (Little Guy: "chocolat chaud! chocolat chaud!")

Boo wanted to run!

We ate late-season blackberries growing on the side of the road, chatted with acquaintances as they drove by, walked all the way down to the village, visited an art exhibit, the empty church and found ourselves on the central sqaure for the second time that day.  It was early evening, around 6:30pm, and the post-rain air was cooler.  A wind was coming up as the light waned and I noticed that people were wearing jeans or long-sleeved shirts.  Gone were the skimpy, sunlight exposing, clothes of only a week ago. I promised a treat and though we didn't have hot chocolate, I bought an orange juice to share and a glass of beer for me.  However, the beer needed something.  A good, hot plate of fries.  Not exactly Riviera but so what?  The evening called for it.